Have you ever known that it was time to let go? How did you know?
Or have you looked back and realized that somehow, you have let something go?
We all know the things you can let go of...
A past love.
A relationship that just wasn’t working well anymore.
An unfulfilling job.
A beloved deceased person or pet.
A home that was right for so long, but is no longer right.
A city that gave you everything you needed when you moved there and now almost seems to be pushing you out.
An idea that you or things “needed” to be a certain way.
Sometimes letting go just happens without us looking. More often it is a choice, a process. Letting go is moving forward into what we want as doors shut behind us.
Ah, the fear of the shut door. Yup, we all know that one. It’s like being a little kid again, getting tucked in at night. The fear is like is the wanting for the day to continue on for fear we might miss something if we say goodnight. We beg our parents to stay be next to us, for the light to stay on. Somehow the light, our parents staying, the day lingering it will protect us, so we request ‘can’t we just leave the door open a little bit?’
You can. As an adult you can leave the door open a little bit, not fully letting go of the day or the thing you wanted to let go of. But (and it's a big But) leaving the door open to what is no longer right for us takes up space in our minds, in our hearts. It is an attempt to hold on to what was rather than what is.
Ok, if you are curious about the signs you are ready to let go – read on.
In honor of upcoming Fall, the ultimate season to make moves and let some shit go here are 8 signs you are ready to let go.
1. Because, Fall. Fall is the prime season for letting go.
Yup, nature rules and this season will almost force you to let go of something no matter how big or small. I know, I know. It’s literally your favorite season but you hate how the light has to get dark. Ironic right? You love the season’s holidays and some feeling that pops up this time of year. But at the same time you already MISS summer like crazy.
Well, as the days shorten our focus starts to shift from outward (activities, adventures, vacations, BBQs) to inwards (our routines, how we care for ourselves, the ways to nourish ourselves, perhaps even old grief or emotional stuff). Nostalgia…. Yeah, that’s that old emotional stuff reminding you that it’s still there. That’s ok by the way, but if you’re ready, fall is there for you. It’s the perfect season to L-E-T G-O.
“In the fall, the trees show us how lovely it is to let the dead things go…”
2. You have been feeling stuck, unmotivated
Maybe - Your job has been the same for years. You love the routine and the support and the people, but the drama, and the repetition it’s just not motivating anymore.
Maybe - You’ve been in the same home for awhile, you love it, every corner is precisely yours. But at the same time you wish you had a new space to create for.
Maybe – You just can’t get yourself to take care of yourself. You used to exercise, cook foryourself, do healthy things… but it Just. Ain’t. Happening.
3. You feel like you are carrying an invisible backpack of rocks
Ugh. Is this depression?
Nah, it doesn’t feel quite that severe, but shit is hard.
Days feel long and treacherous and like you just wish you be on the couch to binge watch Netflix and social media. Forget creative projects or doing new things.
You wish you could put the backpack down, but it just feels heavy, all the time.
4. Some physical symptoms are popping up in your body
Got the emotional blahs?
What about low energy, lethargy, and achiness?
Some of it is Lung stuff, low immunity, sadness, lingering colds, asthma, skin symptoms.
Or maybe some of it is Large Intestine, weird bowel movements, bloating, skin symptoms.
Yup, our bodies are wiser than our minds. If things feel out of balance, it’s time to let go.
5. Whether it’s an ex, a death, a job, a home, a city – you know it’s time for the next thing.
You miss what is gone. Or even preemptively miss what you want to leave. But the heart-achiness is no way to fill your heart or time. You just know, something has got to go, and part of that means you have to let it. You wish you were like that cartoon ice queen princess Elsa – let it go…
6. IT – (the thing you want to let go) you can finally appreciate all the things you loved about it
This is a good sign. This usually means that you are past some of the immediate phases of bitterness, or pure grief. Your fondness will likely not end entirely, but it means that you’re not squishing down lots of anger or grief to resurfacing later. The love is real, and can be a part of the letting go process.
7. The space that loss has left open doesn’t feel quite as frightening
The place that has felt like emptiness now feels like a blank canvas, full of potential and ready to be painted. You are ready, you’re so ready to shut that door. You can’t wait for the next thing. It’s like being a kid, getting tucked in and finally being old enough to not be afraid of the dark. Or being so ready for the nighttime and your dreams.
8. The next good / big thing feels right on the other side of that door.
After all something really good comes after something really bad. You can’t see what’s next but you feel it coming.
So letting go can be hard. Let’s work together to make it easier.